anhelo

i had a rather hard time coming up with an idea for this week's project. 

anhelo. longing yearning desire craving eagerness

but when i began listening to chavela vargas' canciones, specifically "ella," i could feel and hear that emotion of anhelo with every sad pick at the guitar, every drawn out rhythmic strum. after looking up a translation of la letra, i almost immediately knew what i wanted to do.

theres just such beautiful imagery in the [english translation of the] lyrics. lost in a deep abyss. black as my luck. with tears in my eyes, i raise my glass. it definitely made me think of something with a lot of movement, a longing that manifests itself in a physical sense, maybe even distorting. yet there's a beauty to it, as reflected in the song. it made me think of dancers

the chapter on mexican masks also reminded me of anhelo. is the mexican mask there voluntarily, or a thing of tradition? does the mexican WANT to be "always remote, from the world and from other people. and also from himself"

i feel like the chinese culture has a very similar mindset, of believing that opening up and showing emotion is a sign of weakness. but it calls a question to mind: is the "fortress" built to keep intruders outside, or to keep the prisoner inside?

perhaps paz is right, and that is just the kind of attitude that allows the mexican people resilience and fortitude. i also found the image of the long-suffering, vigilant woman that paz describes. both man and woman, hardened by suffering, became a much more stoic and invulnerable shell.